EatJumboShrimp

hello...

Sun, 08 May 2005 03:35:03 GMT

i just got out of the shower. it's about 11:15.

my parents are yelling at me about school and a job and things to that nature.

i think that i'm safe to say that this new year (2005) i've already learned a lot more about myself. actually, let's make that time period longer, the last six months or so, there's been a lot of growth on my part, in my opinion. i've just been...if this is the right word...more involved in a way. but by involved i don't mean extracurricular activities & community service but just concerning life in general. i'm emotionally involved, physically involved, and intellectually interested in things that a year or two ago, i wouldn't imagine have any sort of knowledge about.i have people to thank for that. i feel as for once, i have a choice. i'm almost out of highschool and there's no longer that dictating feeling of what i can and can't do, i mean, everyone can say that "you've had choices your whole life" but that's not true when it comes to school and your parents, you're limited. but in a little less than a month, i'll be open to a whole new section of my life and that's nice to look forward too. i'm sure i'll be dragging everything with me through it, and that's a nice feeling as well. oh what i'd give to be able to see how things will be in five years, ten years, fifteen years....but really if i was given that chance, i'm not so sure i'd take it. just because, well, then there's no fun. okay, how about i get to see, and if i'm happy with it, it gets erased from my memory but it's still the same and if i don't like it, then i can change it. sneaky.

so change of subject due to the instant case that just occured...
i think that when it comes to your family, they should be a support system that you can trust. and by support system, i mean both survivial wise as well as emotionally. you shouldn't have to worry about them putting you down for some unknown reason or any type of abuse to any effect/affect....i'm not so sure of my homonymns right now. (sorry mrs.thompson i forgot that big chart...oh the 1st and 2nd grade) i shouldn't have to worry when i leave my house that my room is going to be invaded, rearranged, then when i confront someone about it worry about being lied too. there shouldn't be a worry of my parents and sisters going behind my back calling my friends to find out exactly what is going on and for how long. there should be some level of trust and privacy. i admit, maybe i have some blame for things being this way but not to the extent of it. i've tried to be nice and abide by the rules i was given, but they aren't happy with it. my mom is annoying and on my back about everything every two seconds. it could be worse and this sounds dramatic probably to the few who are reading it but this is my struggle so there. the more i think about it right now sitting in this chair....my parents are my parents but there just people as well. my sisters are just people. if they aren't going to help me, why stick around and put up with it. sometimes i wonder.

back to the positive side...
i'm thankful for how this past year or year and a half has worked out and i'm looking forward to the next months to come for some reason. call my corny, but i just believe now that good things can last and not all have to come to an end.

that's it for now, i suppose.

:)
goodnight.

and so it is...

Tue, 26 Apr 2005 16:46:09 GMT

::yawn:: time for the once or twice a year update. (exaggeration)

so let's think, what has been going on?
there have been up and downs like whoa in the past few weeks. let's take this one step at a time though...

first of all...
the fighting with my parents have calmed down to almost non-existance with the dumb little fights here and there. since the initiation of there "contract" which i have yet to sign, some sort of civil-ness has been found. i don't have to worry about my deposit being paid on time or anything. this leads me to my next deposit on here...

college...
as far as college is concerned, this wednesday i am going to my top three choices of schools and deciding where i will be attending this fall.
1) NYU - the top choice but most unrealistic when it comes to pricing. and on top of that, my first two years would be me doing what they tell me to do until my third year when i declare a major.
2) Fordham Lincoln Center then 3) Pace University...
i don't know. we'll see how things pan out.
as far as what i'm going to college for, there have been a lot of things going through my head. my all time dream mmm film scoring but that's going to take a lot of work considering i haven't touched music since middle school, if i can even take that into account. i guess we'll see over these next few years. then there's the other major, english. i think i'm deciding on a double major, lots of work, i know but what are you going to do, right?
enough about college.
wednesday will be the deciding factor.

i'm content with how things are right now. and by right now, i mean right this second, writing on my livejournal.

i've gotten to a point with highschool that i don't want to be there anymore. the only reason i will be attending is to graduate to be able to live in manhattan come the fall. i don't even want to think about leaving half of the people here so i won't talk about that....

as far as my friends are concerned...
i always knew that to a point, when highschool finished there would still be some small chance of that same annoying drama that we all went through in tenth grade to show it's ugly head once again and then again and then again and then again. then you try not to let it get to you but it does in some way and you resolve it but you know in the back of your mind that it will be back again to do what it does and it's all sort of the same repeated motions with different words about a different situation. as far as myself, i cut the string more than not. and by that i mean, when it comes to the point of repetition and annoyance, i let it go and move on. i've gone through about three groups of friends because they haven't respected me or didn't know how to live without the dumb fights and drama that they seemed to feed off of. there are a few people i know that i'll never have to worry about losing for two reasons 1) i want them to be around and 2) they want to be around. i hope they know who they are. i think they do. at this point in my life, i've found a constant.

i'm looking at myself rihgt now and i'm realizing that there is a lot that could use improvement but for the most part i'm a good person. i am. some people would fight that statement to the death but it doesn't matter what they say because i know that i, david, am a nice, good person. i am in no way saying that i don't complain or fight or argue or are mean at certain times. but overall, i am a nice guy. people out there who think i'm this horrible person can go suck an egg because it is in no way the truth. i understand that this part of the entry is in no way modest, but i'm allowed to have a good sense of who i am. it's been a short time since the 9th and 10th grade, but there's been a drastic amount of growth in who i am and how i act.

you may ask yourself reading this, why am i writing this? and i am asking myself that same question. this is my livejournal, that's what was on my mind.

i have to go shower and do what's got to be done.
i'll be back soon.
later days.

it's about time...

Thu, 24 Feb 2005 22:26:34 GMT

everytime i update this, i always say "i'm going to keep up with this thing" so instead of saying that and not meaning it, i'm just going to not say it.
anyways, i updated this thing and it was a nice long entry and then somehow it wasn't posted which annoyed me so i punished it by not using it, yeah, not because i just didn't feel like it hahaha.

anyways, the following events are not going to be in any particular order, just as they come to me.
i just got home from getting food with russell and chris. we went to checker's and then KFC...then on the hunt to get chris's bank card back, which happened which is good which is nice which is where i stop saying which.

last night, i went to applebee's on north ocean. they re-did it. it was a nice time. okay, this might sound wierd, but like, it was just really good to just be okay this doesn't make sense to anyone. but just, how i see things, they're awesome. ha.

so the run of scarlet pimpernel is almost done, yeah, i think that's a good thing. i've been to a lot of shows, yes, a lot of them. and i'm anticipating how fun seussical is going to be. yay yay yay fun fun fun.

so what else?
i got into UA (university at albany) which is nice, but i don't think that i want to go there. my sister is transferring there, which isn't the reason i'm not going, the reason is, i just don't want to go there haha.

i've been having mixed feelings about college. on one hand, i want to be away from this house and like be able to do what i want when i want for as long as i want. but at the same time, i don't want to lose contact with some people, okay, i know i won't but i just don't want to have to be alone trying to make new friends. i've grown accustom to certain people and how things are, then at the end of august, it's going to just be thrown about. hopefully, NYU will give me a letter to look forward too. i don't know. at this point, i'm not too sure about my college career. full-time job? year off of college? sounds so tempting but i don't know if i could live in this house that much longer. at least then, i'll be 18 and my parents will absolutely no say on anything. i don't know. i don't want to think about college right now. let me finish high school.

okay,i've reached a point where i just have to hmm in the most basic words, let go. just david, you really have to just stop caring about what other people think and let yourself go ha chenoweth, but really, i just have too. i don't know why i'm scared. well i do know why, and it only will make sense to me, well not just me. but i'm not getting into that on here.

so what else?
hmmmm.i'm talking to stacey smith right now. one time i told her we'd do lunch and then we actually did do lunch. haha. i have to see her more. oh lorraine + bye bye birdie = amazing stacey.

TheFATPolka: well then, when you're done.. send me the link damnit
EatJumboShrimp: okay whoa whoa meanie.
TheFATPolka: ... meanie, i am not.
TheFATPolka: excited, i am.

alright.
i think that's going to be it for now.
later days.

p.s. i hope it snows so much that school on monday is cancelled.
p.p.s. i don't have anything to say here, i just wanted to say "p.p.s."

JEM IS TRULY OUTRAGEOUS!

oh...subject..

Wed, 09 Feb 2005 23:39:06 GMT

so this has been a work in progress, but i'm finishing it now....

so let's recap this week...
friday - was the most boring day ever. i didn't do anything that night but that's okay because it allowed me to stay out the next night haha. i plan it advance. but it was one of those borings that got you so mad until you realized what it was you were getting mad about then you weren't so mad after all.

saturday - russell and chris picked me up, we went to panera but it was too crowded so we went down the street to quizno's then baskin robbins mmmm. after that, i went to CM and waited for pimpernel (chris's show) to start to see it. i met up with mira. it was nice seeing her back from college. we had a nice talk.
the show was good. funny, even at the parts that weren't meant to be funny but were still funny to me.

sunday - hmmm sunday. hahaha, well i slept over chris's that night...i think...wait, did i? yeah. i did. and the next morning, we met up with val and russell and off to see pimpernel again. afterwards, went to get food, coldstone, then superbowl at val's house. i was disappointed at the halftime show. it was...let's say...eventful. i don't like arguments, but it happens. that's about it. i had to go home at 11, sooo i did.

TODAY MEANING TODAY TODAY WEDNESDAY.....
i had the best joke...well...not best...but it made me and maggie laugh for no reason...okay...so we're in the bagel store...we're all at a table but maggie is on a stool...and behind her...is a garbage that is labeled "WASTE" so i turn to maggie, and say "maggie, stop graffiting your name on everything you see" and she turned around...and there it was....okay it wasn't that funny but it was.

a new leaf...

Wed, 02 Feb 2005 03:34:04 GMT

i noticed today in school that when i write with different pens and pencils, my handwriting changes. isn't that cool?
okay, that happens to everyone, to a certain extent.
i'm on the search for any talent, i'll go with what i find. geeze.

things get tough sometimes but it's worth it. it's great how no one knows what that's in reference too. and by tough, i don't actually mean tough, just difficult, well wrong word again. let's just say, schedules don't match up and it can be sad, but i think it's kept good. :) very good.

so i have some clever schemes under way. they're going to be great, if they hold well and stay how i plan.
that reminds me, that i really need a job. big time. money money money i need i need i need.

i can't wait until friday.
i need my night.
i need my weekend.

i have to shave.
i think i should tonight to avoid the task in the morning but i really don't want too and i absolutely hate doing it. i know i'm going to end up doing it tonight.

so i went to the doctor's today.
i got my antibotics.
amoxcillin? is that what it was called.
big white pills.

that's it for tonight.
a short one, but that's alright.
i hate how i don't have control over everything!! not saying that i need control over everything but sometimes people's lives could be better if they could control that things that are uncontrollable...like work schedules ;)
haha no worries.

goooodnight.

point of view...

Tue, 01 Feb 2005 02:59:19 GMT

let's start from a few weeks back:
basically, to sum up a gap of time...
it snowed, i trekked, i sledded, i slept.

had a week off of school because of midterms plus one snow day.
got sick. sore throat. ear infection. the works.

today was the first day back with a new class schedule.
all of it was basically the same except government, a new studyhall, and the switch from journalism to cinema.

anyways, back to this...big venty version of livejournal...

things i hate:
-being insulted.
-made to be felt dumb.
-being left out.

to begin the list. lately i've been thinking that these things happen to me more often then i've noticed. i really don't care, usually, but sometimes it's just annoying when you think about it.
i really thought for a while that i didn't have the ability to hate somebody and maybe i don't and what i think is hate is actually something else is disguise. such as frustration, anger, or just plain annoyance. who's to say? no one but me.
good things in life aren't so good when they're accented by bad ones. i think everyone can agree on that. however, do you take the good times that clearly out weigh the bad and just forget about it? or do you try to get rid of it, to make that good even more..uhm..gooder?
i think that would be selfish but if it makes you happier, then you're happier and that's better than being more sad. clearly.
i'm trying to be vague hear with the thought that saying somethings blunt would hurt people's feelings or just start things that i have no intention of starting, yet. how devious did that sound.
i think i should write a book. a book that would be on the New York Times Bestseller list, even though that isn't a feat considering every book is always on the New York Times Bestseller list.

anyways, back to what i was saying...
i guess everyone has to deal at some point with the problems they think they have. and i guess mine is, unavoidable, so the choice is to deal and be the same as always, stand up and say something knowing that it could cause something worse, or just end it all together. DAVID HOW VAGUE ARE YOU!

i should teach philosophy.
why not?

the more i think about things. the more i convince myself that i am right. but i think nearly everyone has that ability so it isn't something to brag about.

i know one thing is for sure though, i have something great in my life right now and it feels good.

i can't take when people say different things to different people when those different people are clearly going to converse at some point about that original thing. confusing. yes.
maybe that's my problem, communication. no. i may talk fast but my thoughts are coherent and clear no matter how many times i have to repeat them for the slow listening ears of the world.

wow. mr.mcmullan should give me extra credit for my use of voice in this piece.
anyways, i feel that i'm talking wierd, well, typing wierd but i guess if it's getting something across, then why not.

and i know it all sounds dramatic and teenage angst-esque. but really, i was never a dramatic one, i don't think, well to an extent. but there is always that someone egging you on or causing something and it's annoying.

don't accuse me for something you're guilty of.
don't tell me what to do.
don't shut me out.
don't think you're better than me.

cause that's just ridiculous and i'm going to stop caring.

LORD HOW DRAMATIC AM I TONIGHT!!!
scene.

actually, not yet.
excuses, excuses, excuses.
it's clear what the truth is.
so why make up an excuse? especially when everyone knows that everyone knows the truth.

i think i'm done for now.
be prepared livejournal.

i'm coming back strong.

so let's just admit...

Thu, 20 Jan 2005 01:04:44 GMT

it's wednesday.
i woke up this morning and i didn't feel like going to school today for reasons that i will keep to myself and i thought that it wasn't going to happen but, my parents let me stay home. yay. i woke up with a sore throat, which has to be one of the most annoying things of all time, one of those hurts everytime you swallow but you constantly swallow anyways. ugh. go away go away don't come back any other day.

it's snowing. nice big snow. mmmm. i really hope that tomorrow is a snow day so i can have two days off yay. it probably won't happen but i have some hope in there.

so i think i've realize something big today. well, big to me at least. that it's time to stop doing things but start doing others. what am i talking about, you ask?
well...let's just say, it's time for me to just start doing what's right and be honest. the world isn't ready for me, but THEY'RE GETTING IT.
so first bayport-bluepoint, then hopefully NYU, and we'll see where else i go. phew, just gotta do it david...

i need to be in college. or at least anywhere but this house.

time for another survey? i think so.

Questionss Survey
1. What is the geekiest part of your music collection: i have a hootie and the blowfish cd that i won from the public library when i was in fourth grade.
2. What do you eat when you raid the fridge at night: hmm definately ham, lots of ham. AHAHA i don't know, whatever is there. (i was serious about the ham)

3. What is your secret guarenteed weeping movie: i guess there are a lot. like love actually or a walk to remember, or titanic every three months. hmmm garden state as well but that's a stretch. MANSFIELD PARK <3
4. If you could have plastic surgery, what would you have done: my teeth!!! nice big pearly white teeth is my dream.
5. Do you have a completely irrational fear: snakes? is that irrational, i don't think it is.
6. What is a physical habit that gives away your insecure moments: I just sorta sit there and don't laugh. STUPID QUESTION NUMBER 1
7. Do you know anyone famous: of course, bryce and ashlee. we go way back. and i know myself, of course.

8. Describe your bed: it's a pretty decent sized bed. it's wooden, and has light green sheets along with a dark green heavier sheet with some trees and some moose on it. then there's the dark red, dark blue, dark green plaid comforter with two pillows and two big pillows on the side so i don't fall! but i'm supposed to have a big white down comforter and blue sheets, i just suck at life.
9. Do you know how to play poker: yes, is that all?
10. What do you carry with you at all times: ....nothing? money and the phoneeee.
11. What do you miss most about being little: everything in the world ever there was when i was little.
12. Are you happy with your given name: Yeah, I really had no choice in the matter. it's like who i am. i am dave.
13. How much money would it take to give up the internet for one year: a lot a lot a lot. a billion. couple million, maybe.
14. What color is your bedroom: light blue walls, white ceiling, dark blue carpet.
15. What was the last song you listened to: hmm let me think. that song from tuck everlasting 'there are two roads to walk down but one road to choose so i'm thinking over the things that you said...THINKING OVERRRR THINKING IT OVERRR'
16. Have you ever been in a play: GOING BUGGY, kindergarden, don't forget it.
17. Do you like yourself and believe in yourself: Sometimes. STUPID QUESTION THAT I DON'T FEEL LIKE ANSWERING. yes yes yes.
18. Do transient, homeless, or starving people sometimes annoy you: sometimes, when i'm like standing there and they come up to me asking for money. get outta here. i barely have enough for myself. does that make me cold hearted? didn't think so.
19. Do you consider yourself to be a nice person: i think i am a nice person.

20. Do you spend more time with your girlfriend/boyfriend or your friends: well i believe that the person you are emotionally involved with should be a friend so i guess it's equal.
21. What's one thing you wish you could do but can't: ugh the list goes on and on, PLAY PIANO!
22. What is your ideal marriage location: too young for that. AH ST PATRICKS CATHEDRAL ON FIFTH AVENUE is so tempting but sometimes i think, smaller is better and cuter on a hill like WALK TO REMEMBER
23. What's one instrument you wish you could play: PIANO.
24. Something you love and hate: dumb.
25. What kind of bedding do you use: cotton and flannel. is flannel cotton with a twist?
26. Whats one language you want to learn: french. la fille danse con tel ju a vec moi de la something something
27. What do you order at a bar: i'm 16, shirley temples bitch.
28. Have you ever pierced your body parts: i had an ear pierced once.
29. Do you have any tattoos: nope!
30. Would you admit to getting plastic surgery if confronted: yes
31. Do you drive stick: not at all.
32. Whats one trait you hate in a person: hmmm you know. i don't want to tell you.
33. What kind of watch do you wear: i don't wear a watch beb.
34. Do you consider yourself materialistic: haha sometimes but most often no, nope i'm not.
35. What do you cook best: killer egg chef. and that's about it. oh my lord i read that wrong at first.
36. Favorite writing instrument: i'd say pen NO I CHANGE MY MIND sharpie markers.
37. Do you prefer to blend in or stand out: stand out but not to the point where it looks like someone is trying to do it just to stand out. whatever
38. Do you ever go out dressed like the opposite sex: i have a pair of girl jeans. hahaha
39. What is one car you will never buy: i don't care.
40. What kind of books do you like to read: the ones in that cool section at border's <3
41. If you won the lottery, what would you do: buy stuff!
42. Burial or cremation: burial, i'd say.
43. Whats one thing you are a sore loser at: uhm hmm. everything?
44. If you don't like a person, how do you show it: depends on the person. i don't like people.
45. Do you cry in front of your friends: never. but i've been slipping up kinda lately.
46. What kind of first impression do you think you give people: no clue. happy and fun?
47. Whats one thing you like to do alone: shower. WELL actually, i like to go to the bathroom alone.
48. Are you a giver or a taker: neither.
49. What have you stolen before: yes'm, oh you asked what, sorry.
50. How many drinks before your tipsy: like one.
51. Do you ever have to beg: yes, my parents sometimes.
52. Have you ever done any illegal drugs: illegal as in illegal no one can do ever, nope. illegal as in underage, yes.
53. Do you think you're cute: hahaha sometimes.
54. Do you have a problem changing clothes in front of your friends: depends on who i'm hanging out with.
55. Whats the most painful experience you've ever had (emotionally and/or physically): emotionally - when someone passed away aakglhdslkghas physically - when i was cutting an apple and stabbed myself in the hand and passed out.
56. Favorite communication method: aim for life, thank you.
but cell phone is creeping up.

okay i'm done with that.
i hope i come out of this survey phase fast.

later days,
david

Wed, 19 Jan 2005 01:02:35 GMT

i'm in the process of watching garden state...again.
the soundtrack is awesome.
i want to do film scoring.
but it is never going to happen, at least not by freshman year of college.

speaking of which, i'm applied to all of my top choices so now is just the waiting period...doo...dooo...
NYU, Fordham Lincoln Center, Marymount Manhattan, Pace University, Fredonia, New Paltz, Albany, and Binghamton....let's see how this goes.

i've spent the last seven days afterschool in the guidance office, annoying.
tomorrow i have an academic decathalon (nerd) meet but i hope we don't have enough people to compete so i don't have to go. that's horrible, but there are other things that i'd like to do. if i'm not out of that school but ninth period, i'm going to have to go. so let's hope that some people don't show up. i know it's bad of me to not stick with my responsibilities, but it's totally lame.

so what else? i want to go to the city while it is still cold. any takers? i don't think anyone really reads this so why do i ask questions to the general public on here?

so i'm bored so time for a quiz...

When was the last time you ...

Smiled?: five minutes ago.
Laughed?: watching garden state before.
Cried?: hmmm.
Bought something?: today i bought a bagel and a nestea.
Danced?: before in my room.
Were sarcastic?: god, every second ever.
Kissed someone?: i plead the fifth.
Talked to an ex?: what?
Watched your favorite movie?: i have lots of favorite but i watched on about an hour ago.
Had a nightmare?: hahaha.

A Last time for everything ...

Last book you read: Oedipus by Sophocles, i guess that's a play. so before that it was Things Fall Apart by Chinua Achebe
Last movie you saw: garden state.
Last song you heard: "brightest" by copeland
Last thing you had to drink: diet pepsi
Last time you showered: this morning.
Last thing you ate: burnt steak nasty.

Do You ...

Smoke?: no.
Do drugs?: nope.
Have sex?: never, i'm going for priesthood.
Sleep with stuffed animals?: nope.
Live in the moment?: yes, i'd say so.
Have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: yes.
Have a dream that keeps coming back?: nope.
Play an instrument?: NO. I WANT TO LEARN TO PLAY PIANO AND GUITAR AND THE HARP BUT IT JUST ISN'T GOING TO HAPPEN BECAUSE DAVID HAS NO MUSICAL TALENT.
Believe there is life on other planets?: sure do. why not?
Remember your first love?: yes
Still love him/her?: whatever personal questions.
Read the newspaper?: when it's there, i read it.
Believe in miracles?: corny.
Believe it's possible to remain faithful forever?: yes.
Consider yourself tolerant of others?: i think so. for the most part.
Consider love a mistake?: not at all.
Like the taste of alcohol?: depends on what it is.
Have a favorite candy?: i get cravings for different ones at different times.
Believe in astrology?: depends on my moods.
Believe in magic?: yes...have you seen FLOAT?
Believe in God?: ...yawn.
Pray?: no.
Go to church?: nope.
Have any secrets?: sure do. well, depends on who you're applying it too.
Have any pets: yes, kramer.
Do well in school?: i think so.
Go to or plan to go to college?: yes.
Have a major?: not yet.
Talk to strangers who instant message you?: mhmm, when it happens, unless they wierd me out, then i block them.
Wear hats?: yes.
Have any piercings?: nope.
Have any tattoos?: nah.
Hate yourself?: i wouldn't say that i hate myself.
Have an obsession?: in a way.
Have a secret crush?: haha it's not such a secret.
Do they know yet?: hahaha.
Collect anything?: books, cds.
Have a best friend?: i hope so.
Wish on stars?: corny.
Like your handwriting?: sometimes.
Have any bad habits?: mhmmm
Care about looks?: well, who doesn't?
Boy/girlfriend's looks?: i don't quite understand. they look awesome.
Friends and other people?: my friends are gawgous.
Believe in witches?: YES
Believe in Satan?: what?
Believe in ghosts?: ha.

that thing was dumb, i'm not satisfied yet.

HOMETOWN?
Bayport-BluePoint, NY

CROUTONS OR BACON BITS?
Croutons. I used to think of croutons as the most elite classy status symbol a restaurant could offer. This was, ironically, when Wendy's still had a salad bar, which included croutons... I wasn't always too observant. Or maybe I thought Wendy's was classier than other fast food places, and, actually, it was. <---okay the person i stole this from wrote that so i just had to keep it.

SALAD DRESSING?
RANCH!!! most of the time.

SHAMPOO OR CONDITIONER?
well, you can't have one without the other i say.

HAVE YOU EVER GONE SKINNY DIPPING?
yes. wait, yes.

FAVORITE COLOR?
sure.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN CONVICTED OF A CRIME?
no!!!! well, depends on what you mean by convicted and what you mean by crime.

ONE PILLOW OR TWO?
two usually.

HOBBIES?
sure.

DREAM CAR
oh god, one that looks so cool. or one that works. and has heat. and a cd player.

WORDS OR PHRASES YOU OVERUSE?
"get outta here"

PIERCING OR TATTOOS?
None.

HOW DO YOU CHARACTERIZE YOURSELF (A HOPELESS OR NON-HOPELESS ROMANTIC)?
HUH?

DO YOU GET ALONG WITH YOUR PARENTS?
not at all.

FAVORITE TOWN TO CHILL IN?
Port Jeff. i don't know, dumb question.

FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
I like the stream-of-consciousness aspect of this being right after the "chill" question... Anyway, Haagen Dazs' has this exquisite chocolate that's like Dutch or Hungarian Chocolate... I forget. Something European. It's so good. It's so good. I also really like the ginger and lemongrass and other exotic ice creams at Indochine, and I'm told that someplace in Denver has all of that and more and I want to go. <----that was the person before me's answer i say coldstone.

FAVORITE WEBSITE?
hahaha WHAT?!?!?

FAVORITE DRINK?
depends. grape juice? grape soda? ginger ale? mmm juice in general JAMBA JUICE!!!

NON-ALCOHOLIC?
oh, woops.

WHAT'S YOUR BEDTIME?
laughs.

ADIDAS, NIKE, OR REEBOK?
out of those three? ew. i'd say nike, maybe adidas. but really none of them.

FAVORITE PERFUME/COLOGNE?
Aqui De Gio, is that spelt right?

FAVORITE SONGS AT THE MOMENT?
shut up.

FAVORITE MUSICAL GROUPS?
damien rice. ben folds. copeland. fun fun fun.

MOST RECENT HUMILIATING MOMENT?
....

LOUDEST PERSON YOU KNOW?
stacey maybe. or andrew.

CRAZIEST OR SILLIEST PERSON YOU KNOW?
everyone!

FAVORITE HOLIDAY?
all of them.

FAVORITE BOOK?
one book?

FAVORITE WRITERS?
shut up.

FAVORITE WORK OF ART?
oh lord. does music count as a work of art? i think it should.

FAVORITE ARTISTS?
you really just have to stop.

FAVORITE MOVIE OF ALL TIME?
OF ALL TIME?!?!

MOVIE YOU COULD WATCH OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN?
i think i'm done with this survey.

FAVORITE TV SHOW?
i hate you.

GREATEST FEARS?
you too.

SAY ONE NICE THING ABOUT THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU.
i don't know them, they're wierd.

okay, i got mad at that towards the end hahaha.
so i think i'm done with livejournal for the night....

GOOOOOODNIGHT!!!

it's been a while...

Tue, 18 Jan 2005 04:26:41 GMT

this thing hasn't seen much action in quite a time, don't ya think?

i'm really too lazy to type out all that has happened since my last entry, so don't count on getting anything too new and exciting.
well, the year's different to start out. so even though it is 17 days into the new year, i'll get things going but a quiz survey thingg that i'm stealing from stacey's journal...

1. What did you do in 2004 that you'd never done before?
hmmm.

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I have made some for this year, but i don't think i had any for last year, bummer.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
nope.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
nope.
5. What countries did you visit?
....

6. What would you like to have in 2005 that you lacked in 2004?
more money, a job, less drama.

7. What date from 2004 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
there are many a date. may 28th, august 6th, december 4th, may 5th, oh they go on and on and on and on c'mon c'mon c'mon c'mon

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
....PROM KING! it just had to happen.

9. What was your biggest failure?
...homecoming king hahahaha, no no, uhm you know your life isn't that bad when that's your failure. DUDE WHO CARES ABOUT FAILURES? god pessi.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
there was that sun raping i got at the beach. ow.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
that I bought? hmm.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
...i don't understand. everyones!

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
yeah, we're not going there.

14. Where did most of your money go?
FOOD!

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
prom, rocket summer, christmas, birthday, frienddsss.

16. What song will always remind you of 2004?
wow, uhm, one song? i don't know, yellowcard - ocean avenue? or fred jones pt. 2 HOW CAN ONE SONG BE AN ENTIRE YEAR??!

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? happier, definately.
ii. thinner or fatter? fatter.
iii. richer or poorer? the same. no money. actually, i have giftcards, do they count?

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
talked to more people more, been a little more nicer.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
been a bitch hahaha

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
well i spent christmas already. i was at my home in the morning then went out with friends at night, SAW LEMONY SNICKETT'S!

22. Did you fall in love in 2004?
i plead the fifth.

23. How many one-night stands?
none. ha, well it depends on what you mean...NONE!

24. What was your favorite TV program?
i'm going with stacey on this one....VH1.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
yes.

26. What was the best book you read?
ohhh books, let me think now....

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
ashley straw and christopher distefano. and we cannot forget cassie house.

28. What did you want and get?
PROM KING! hahahhaa, oh wait, for christmas?

28. What did you want and not get?
ew.

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
hmmmm. of this year? garden state maybe. i don't remember.

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
17th birthday, went to roosevelt field mall with lindsay and jamie so see ashlee simpson perform, met up with maggie and shea there. then went home, out to sayville starbuck's alone, ran into flynnstah, then walked to summerfest where i met up with a gang of people ya know elese, g-unit, letsch, laney, fun fun people went to applebee's where i ran into even more people ashley, chris, cassie, andrew, brett, the list goes on and on and on.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
...hmmm.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2004?
uhm completely awesome.

34. What kept you sane?
my friends, and music. (ditto stace)

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
natalie portman i fancied. uhm who else did i fancy, i fancied everyone.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
okay no politics please.

37. Who did you miss?
...no comment.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
wow, the list of people i met last year. chris, ashley, andrew, stacey, val, russell, cassie, sarah, ryan, ryan, mira, kristen, jamie, alana, ash boyd, sarah, james pea, god, i could go on forever.

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2004:
independence and sticking to what you want is key.

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
WHAT?!?! get outta here.

okay, so i was going to write a lot more after that survey but i think that is enough typing for now. maybe i'll get back into the swing of things with livejournal, who knows. later days everyone.

Wed, 13 Oct 2004 22:22:12 GMT

I haven't updated this in so long. so long that the layout to update this thing has changed without me knowing it.

some better points:
-nominated for homecoming king
-won starbucks giftcard
-finally got my snowvest
-job's going well

some worser points:
-convinced the majority of the people i used to talk to hate me no matter how much they deny it
-school work sucks
-shaving
-college stuff is stressful

i have no idea why i just did that but formulating a list was sorta fun for me so if you didn't like it, oh well. i wonder if i have driver's ed this saturday, i really hope that i don't. the break from it has just made me feel good. or, i just don't like going to it.

i really need to see garden state but it's only playing in stonybrook and at a theatre over by roosevelt field mall but see that's a problem when one doesn't drive. i can't wait until i pass my roadtest and are able to drive freely, it's going to be so fun. anyways, back to garden state, i know it's one of those movies where the music fits perfectly to what's going on in the scene. i would love to be that person who is able to put the music to the screen and the scenes but one has to know about music in order to do that so my dream there is crushed, unless i turn around and learn everything there is to know about film scoring, the end of that bit.

the weather is getting colder anything and i'm heavily enjoying it. the coldness means cooler winter clothes, more layers, and just more fun. it's freeing, as corny as that sounds. it feels good to go out at night and it not be warm as hell that you can only wear a tshirt and shorts. the jackets and the scarves and the sweaters are good for us all. i need winter and december and the city.

that brings me on the topic of college. my parents viewpoint is starting to be embedded into my mind "david, you aren't going to get into NYU so don't get your hopes up" too late, my hopes are up. i know there's is a huge significant chance that i'm not going to get in but the want and the dream is there. so let me sit there with my NYU sweatshirt and pretend, that atmosphere was just so where i need to be when i went. who knows? maybe if i don't get accepted there, i'll get into somewhere in boston, or worthington, or connecticut, i have no idea where i'm going to end up. the future sucks.

next week is spirit week. that's always a good time. god, how boring is this entry turning out. i think i always begin with this sorta crap before it ever turns into something more out of this. well, spirit week, and i'm a senior, so it's going to be the most fun. let me think of the spirit days:
- color day (we all wear red <--dumbest thing in existance)
- cowboy day (should be fun and i finally get to wear this thing i always thought looked too western to be worn in school)
- professional day aka career day aka LAME STUPID DAY (i mean, c'mon now)
- pajama day (the all time favorite amongst us all)
- blue n' gold day (school colors and pep rally fun fun fun)
oh, and we have to wear sunglasses all week as well.

and then thursday (the night before pep rally and the homecoming dance) us seniors get to go late late late at night and toilet paper the school. mmm tradition. how nice it's going to be.
then friday's pep rally is always awesome and we always win.
then homecoming dance we find out who wins king.
nicole scollo and andrea are going to escort me :-) it's going to be beyond amazing.

what's next? oh, well, hopefully starbucks or something after the dance.

then it's homecoming weekend which is just so sooo much fun.
something about homecoming is always just great.
our float is aladdin and we're going to win so just face it.

okay, enough about homecoming, that's not for another week.

i feel like i have a lot coming up. maybe i do, who knows.
well i don't feel like typing in here anymore but i'll guess i'll do the picture thing because hey, pictures are awesome...

so....those are some of my favorites.
and, who wants to go to port jeff with me when it snows? or the city? and wear scarves? and drink coffee? how awesome ::sigh::

that's it.
bye.
the end.

....a difference!

Tue, 21 Sep 2004 00:42:58 GMT

i really haven't been using this thing lately. i'll try to get myself back into the swing again. so let's see, i guess i'll just do the whole 'random topic' thing.

i started driver's ed. i really can't wait until i'm able to drive. then i'll be able to leave whenever i want and be able to pick people up and listen to good music and sing songs and get starbucks whenever i want. i know i'm going to hate it after the first couple of months cause everyone says that's how it goes but i'm anticipating this. anyways, my car has two girls in it with me so it isn't all the way full and that's okay. haha first day went alright, just drove around normal places, got a little scared on the highway but i'd say i did alright. second week, downpouring rain, haha she tried to teach me how to parallel park but i already forgot how to do that by now, and southern state parkway in the pouring rain is a little not so fun but i did my best. haha, it was fun getting soaked on the way into lecture, oh wait, no it wasn't.

so as i said in my last entry, i got a job. it's going good, i think except the whole driving to the mall thing is sorta difficult at times and i start panicing when i can't find a ride in time. at first i thought i wasn't going to talk to anyone there but they are all pretty nice. well, most of them are, some are just annoying and bitchy. what are ya gonna do though? i get paid on friday. i'm seriously thinking about quitting just because the distance is getting sorta hard to deal with, but that would, of course be after i use my fifty percent discounts. mmm snowvest and sweater and corduroys!!! hahaha.

school's boring as hell for me. i really want to drop out but i never would. i always do the whole i won't do homework but i always pride myself in being a good test taker hence why my grades always stay decent. i know i can do better but i don't put in the effort so i just sorta roll along. i know that's bad but oh well, i don't feel like doing school stuff. i've always been like that and hopefully won't always be but i ain't changing yet. hahaha.

my parents suck.
i'll leave it at that.
not really in the mood to get into the arguments and fights and problems on here because i'm not really into that right now.

i can't wait for this weekend.
i can't wait for halloween.
i can't wait for homecoming.
i can't wait for christmas.
i can't wait for colder weather.
i can't wait for college, well, i sorta can. i have mixed feelings on that one.

alright, i planned to make this thing longer but i'm drawing a blank on what i should talk about and what i shouldn't be talking about, if that makes sense.

let's get starbucks. i haven't had it in a while, like, seriously, over a month, well, maybe not that long, but i'm craving something right about now. see, if i could drive, i would go get some.

that's enough for now.
on one hand i'm really really happy.
on the other, i'm really really sad.

talk about bi-polar.

later days.

it's been a long time...

Wed, 08 Sep 2004 01:43:17 GMT

so since i've last updated this thing. summer has ended, school has started, i've gotten a job, people have changed, just, basically, a lot of stuff has went on.

day before school was a tragic cram to finish all of summer work. i read the great gatsby and it is now one of my most favorite books and i did the essay for that. the physics homework i didn't do but she gave me an extention and it still isn't done.

that same day i went to the mall with my mom and i was offered a job at abercrombie and fitch, the kids store though because i'm not quite old enough to work at the normal store. that made my day. i'm not really being very descriptive because i just don't feel like it right now.

school was school. same old boring nasty it always was and always will be. i thought i was going to be excited for this year but it really doesn't seem that way. i'm already not doing homework and slacking off, so i can't wait to see where i am come mid-january, that'll be something. i actually have homework to do right now but that won't be getting done for at least another hour or two.

the job's alright. i've already worked three times and it's not too hard at all. fitting rooms, folding, maintaing, size stickers, and go-backs. that's about it.

i'd have to say that i've had one of the best nights ever since i've last updated this thing. i don't even want to describe it on here. it was a shock and just an awesome feeling. haha, thats enough about that.

what next....

okay i don't feel like typing in here anymore because i'm bored with it and i know i should be definately doing homework since it's now a week into school and i've yet to complete my summer assignment, and i'm betting, it isn't getting done tonight either.

be back later to finish it up.

rambling...

Fri, 27 Aug 2004 05:28:43 GMT

so things have been different lately.
not different beyond belief different but instead, just noticeabley changed? i guess, if that's the way to put it.
i know exactly who reads this thing. so i know when i say something on here, i know who read it and know that they know what i'm thinking in some shape or form, if that made any sense to anyone.

i've noticed how people can change and how they act differently in such short time due to really insignificant things. all in the course of one summer have the views of me changed negatively in one group of people and for the most part, positively in the other group.

funny how friends change and moods shift, whether you realize it or not, and it always comes down to you, yourself, thinking that you're the only one who hasn't changed because you can't tell since you've been with yourself the entire time.i guess nothing is really going to come from any of this rambling except that i've realized something in the course of this speedy summer.

i've realized some people don't care at all.
i've realized some people care too much.
i've realized that...

i don't feel like finishing any of that because a lot of it is pointless stuff that no one really needs to know.

all i want is more.
that only makes sense to me.

i'm going to be a senior this year.
then i graduate
and get the hell out of here.
here being the hellhole of a house that i live in.

yeahhhhh definately finished for now

i watched donnie darko tonight.
it was a good movie.
got me to think about lots of stuff.

bye.

so close that i can't see what's going on...

Wed, 18 Aug 2004 17:05:22 GMT

so come on courage, teach me to be shy
cause it's not hard to fall
and i don't want to scare her
it's not hard to fall
and i don't want to lose...
it's not hard to grow when you know
that you just don't know

ahhh. damien rice. so good.

i haven't really updated this thing in a while and knowing that i have a lot on my mind right now means that i'm going too even if afterwards, all that have read it either end up confused or just not understandin a single word i have typed on here. i guess the feeling that i might've gotten at least a tiny bit of something out of my system is a good feeling that makes it worth it for me.

so where do i begin? i've been hanging out with different people lately. not new people, people i've known for a couple of months now but i've been seeing them more often. and i like it. they make me feel good about myself and make me feel that they want me to be there. is that conceited that i want to feel good? i don't know.
it's just starting to seem that people are mad at my happiness and i don't know what to do with it all. cause the whole 'two groups of friends' thing is getting difficult to standby more and more as time goes on.

whatever. i guess i'll get into that later.

west side story
it was so fun. all three times.
i met a lot of new people INCLUDING ALANA WHO LOOKS JUST LIKE LINDSAY LOHAN. just in case the world was wondering.
everyone in the cast was soo good i wanted to like die watching it.

ashley straw and christopher distefano blew me away.
like far away, really far away.
(they were maria & tony, fake hair and all)
but my lord, such talent that ashley won't believe that she has but deep down you know she knows that she has talent even if she claims she doesn't believe it. i'll stop with that.
and chris singing 'maria' had to have been the highlight of each night for me.

so what do you do when you come home from a really fun night to messages from everyone that are mean and borderline insulting? do you defend yourself, or do you fight back, or do you apologize although you don't think or don't realize you're doing anything wrong?
that was rhetorical.

it just seems that lately i've been getting this, 'hey dave, whatever you suck' vibe from my friends in my town and i don't know what to do about it. i guess i can't juggle all the friends i want to have but i'm not going to give up on anyone as much as it may seem that i am, i'm not giving up.
i guess i just don't appreciate being called 'someone who doesn't care about anyone but himself and his own stupid world, and thinks they're better than everyone else' which just isn't the case for me.

oh well, if somehow the entire world would just learn to be a little less dramatic.

i got to see cassie the other day. i always enjoy seeing her hahaha. she's leaving to college soon and i probably won't see her before that happens so that makes me sad but it was good to see her at jeff's.

what an entry. nothing is coherent and everything is very jumpy from one topic to another.

i'm not a miracle, you're not a saint, JUST ANOTHER SOLDIER ON A ROAD TO NOWHERE
i happen to love that line.

i thought this was going to be a nice long, explain myself entry but i don't think it has done anything but make me more confused about current situations. yes, i just said current situations and that sounds wierd everytime i say it.

why think too hard? when it's so soothing dancinggg through lifeeee

i'm done.
later days.

laced with brilliant smiles and shining eyes...

Tue, 10 Aug 2004 04:35:30 GMT

i haven't updated this thing in quite a while but here i am and i'm doing it with a bang, or actually not such a bang.

let me retrace the days back to my birthday...

august 6th - (friday)
i really had no clue what i was going to do on my birthday until the morning of. i just know that i didn't want to sit home all day in my pajamas until my parents got home and would force me out to dinner, even if they can't realize that that never was a tradition for my birthday. so i woke up early to get a headstart on things - saw my parents in the morning, no happy birthday message or any gift, they then left to work.
lindsay came and picked me up, and we got jamie and we were off to the mall (Roosevelt Field) to see Ashlee Simpson perform. we got their at 10:00 (about) expecting a 3:00 show, but we ended up crowded, front of the balcony until 7:00 when she hit the stage and sang for us.
i almost got beat up by this boy and his gangsta friends, but jamie got them to back down. we saw people we didn't really want to see but it made the day funnier.
on the way out i ran into becky!! which was awesome bcause it feels like i haven't seen her in such a long time because well, i haven't.

on the way home lindsay and i had to drop jamie and maggie off at jones beach for a concert they were going too and i got home around 9:00ish. i decided to go into sayville alone with hopes i'd run into laura, but instead i saw flynn first, and then i saw katie, katie, g-unit, elese, laney, and a whole buncha other people.
some of us decided to go to applebee's to finish off my birthday. that was nice. what was even more nice, was that i ran into chris, ashley, ryan, andrew, cassie, sarah, jeff, and everyone from west side story there. that was nice.
yupp yupp, so that was my birthday. good time i think.

i was going to go day by day on here but i really don't feel like it. so instead i'll just try to say it real fast.
i saw ryan cabrera live, he played acoustic, it was so good.
i went to the beach on sunday with laura and laney where we met up with more people.
laura put dog shit on my towel though ~.~
that night i saw west side story and went to applebee's with approximately a million people.

i just got back from dancing in the starbucks parking lot to ashlee simpson with flynnstah and jamie.

tomorrow i start driving lessons and i really don't want too.
on top of that, i have no idea where my permit is and i really need it for tomorrow.

my dad is cursing on the phone with my sister.
i really don't like family. i know that sounds like i'm complaining and that a lot of people have it a lot worse. but for me, it's my struggle. i just don't understand why they act they way they do if we're supposed to be 'family'.
'why are you still up?' 'shut the fuck up, that's why i'm still up' - you know, normal loving dialogue.

i found out why my parents didn't give me the card/money they got me for my birthday until the next day. my mom said that i didn't deserve anything because i didn't act like a family and i didn't want to go out to dinner with them.
are we family everytime they call me 'a miserable little fuck'? or a stupid faggot? or their piece of shit son?
yeah. some family we got going on here.

maybe i shouldn't have typed any of that, but i did.
deal with it.

my parents make me want to go out every night, drink and do drugs, have sex with everyone, fail all my classes, and never go to college or get anywhere in life because they don't deserve what i do.

random venting. this entry might be made private soon.
maybe my parents are right? do i have no ambition and will i not get anywhere i want to be? i know all these talented people and when it comes down to it...i don't have any talents. i guess i have time, i'm only 16, wait, 17 now and it feels so wierd. like, i usually don't feel the change from birthday to birthday, but with this one, i do feel older.
this all seems very dramatic, but it's just how i am right now.

it's time like these when i should think of the stuff i do have and try to make this bad mood into a good one. but for some reason, it always seems that bad stuff affect you more than good stuff does, i mean, i wasn't having a bad night, until i got back here and just thought.
it's hard not think sometimes, especially when i go avoiding it for the longest time, which i have been doing lately.

i'm just waiting for something.
i don't even know what.

i get yelled at for coming home from applebee's at 12:45.
but my sisters are out drinking in a hotel room and tomorrow nothing will be wrong.
whatever world. i guess everythings always unfair.

so just ask the question
come untie the knot
say you won't care
say you won't care

retrace the steps
as if we forgot
say you won't care
say you won't care

i don't know what to type anymore.
i guess this all sounds pretty dumb.

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i haven't updated this thing in quite a while but here i am and i'm doing it with a bang, or actually not such a bang.

let me retrace the days back to my birthday...

august 6th - (friday)
i really had no clue what i was going to do on my birthday until the morning of. i just know that i didn't want to sit home all day in my pajamas until my parents got home and would force me out to dinner, even if they can't realize that that never was a tradition for my birthday. so i woke up early to get a headstart on things - saw my parents in the morning, no happy birthday message or any gift, they then left to work.
lindsay came and picked me up, and we got jamie and we were off to the mall (Roosevelt Field) to see Ashlee Simpson perform. we got their at 10:00 (about) expecting a 3:00 show, but we ended up crowded, front of the balcony until 7:00 when she hit the stage and sang for us.
i almost got beat up by this boy and his gangsta friends, but jamie got them to back down. we saw people we didn't really want to see but it made the day funnier.
on the way out i ran into becky!! which was awesome bcause it feels like i haven't seen her in such a long time because well, i haven't.

on the way home lindsay and i had to drop jamie and maggie off at jones beach for a concert they were going too and i got home around 9:00ish. i decided to go into sayville alone with hopes i'd run into laura, but instead i saw flynn first, and then i saw katie, katie, g-unit, elese, laney, and a whole buncha other people.
some of us decided to go to applebee's to finish off my birthday. that was nice. what was even more nice, was that i ran into chris, ashley, ryan, andrew, cassie, sarah, jeff, and everyone from west side story there. that was nice.
yupp yupp, so that was my birthday. good time i think.

i was going to go day by day on here but i really don't feel like it. so instead i'll just try to say it real fast.
i saw ryan cabrera live, he played acoustic, it was so good.
i went to the beach on sunday with laura and laney where we met up with more people.
laura put dog shit on my towel though ~.~
that night i saw west side story and went to applebee's with approximately a million people.

i just got back from dancing in the starbucks parking lot to ashlee simpson with flynnstah and jamie.

tomorrow i start driving lessons and i really don't want too.
on top of that, i have no idea where my permit is and i really need it for tomorrow.

my dad is cursing on the phone with my sister.
i really don't like family. i know that sounds like i'm complaining and that a lot of people have it a lot worse. but for me, it's my struggle. i just don't understand why they act they way they do if we're supposed to be 'family'.
'why are you still up?' 'shut the fuck up, that's why i'm still up' - you know, normal loving dialogue.

i found out why my parents didn't give me the card/money they got me for my birthday until the next day. my mom said that i didn't deserve anything because i didn't act like a family and i didn't want to go out to dinner with them.
are we family everytime they call me 'a miserable little fuck'? or a stupid faggot? or their piece of shit son?
yeah. some family we got going on here.

maybe i shouldn't have typed any of that, but i did.
deal with it.

my parents make me want to go out every night, drink and do drugs, have sex with everyone, fail all my classes, and never go to college or get anywhere in life because they don't deserve what i do.

random venting. this entry might be made private soon.
maybe my parents are right? do i have no ambition and will i not get anywhere i want to be? i know all these talented people and when it comes down to it...i don't have any talents. i guess i have time, i'm only 16, wait, 17 now and it feels so wierd. like, i usually don't feel the change from birthday to birthday, but with this one, i do feel older.
this all seems very dramatic, but it's just how i am right now.

it's time like these when i should think of the stuff i do have and try to make this bad mood into a good one. but for some reason, it always seems that bad stuff affect you more than good stuff does, i mean, i wasn't having a bad night, until i got back here and just thought.
it's hard not think sometimes, especially when i go avoiding it for the longest time, which i have been doing lately.

i'm just waiting for something.
i don't even know what.

i get yelled at for coming home from applebee's at 12:45.
but my sisters are out drinking in a hotel room and tomorrow nothing will be wrong.
whatever world. i guess everythings always unfair.

<i>so just ask the question
come untie the knot
say you won't care
say you won't care

retrace the steps
as if we forgot
say you won't care
say you won't care</i>

i don't know what to type anymore.
i guess this all sounds pretty dumb.

<insert toothy smile here?>

goodnight everyone.

free from the life that you knew...

Sun, 01 Aug 2004 04:26:42 GMT

i am completely overstuffed with food right now.
today we were thinking and thinking of stuff to do with ourselves and everything was brought back to food.

italian ices (pink lemonade is impressive), the diner, the ground round (even without food), and applebee's.
all in the course of one day.
it was actually insanely funny and eventful none the less. worth it to me.

ground round was so scary. we didn't get food and ran out of it. well,i ran, the others walk. and the constant references to 'we' include myself, maggie, and jamie. too much sarcasm to handle.

okay, so let's talk about yesterday.
we started off going to the beach but didn't cause the weather was crappy so we (katie, laura, and i) ended up going to friendly's and hanging out at laura's till later on when i had to go get a haircut. the i met a bunch of people up at starbuck's and we went to see The Village.

i loved the movie.

things have been wiered lately for me. i know i say that a lot, but i'm saying it because i think it's the truth. it's becoming a struggle working with friends because of the different groups i hangout with. i never thought it would get this difficult but it has. jealousy and wierdness just make things oh so difficult for me.

a part of me says that i shouldn't get too personal on here but at the same time, it is my choice what i say on here and at the end of the day, i could delete it if someone gets offended or angry at me because of anything i say. oh well.

by the way, my sister got her haircut too, she got bangs. i like how they look.

back to what i was saying. i don't know how to impress people or care for people or know what someone wants without them telling me. i don't know what kind of person that makes me, but i think that's how it is for me. i know i'm a good person, i think i am. if i ever got into a relationship, i think i'd be excellent, but it's hard for me to find a boundary in things. i'm talking myself in circle and not applying anything to anything else.

i guess. i mean, when friends expect more than you know how to do or thought you were able to do, things get wierd. wow, i do sound like the most confusing thing in the textbook.

oh well, this is my journal and i can say whatever i want, even if it is extremely difficult to understand. sometimes i don't even realize what i'm typing until i am done typing them already and i have no desire to delete it because somewhere in me, that was dying to get out.

'do you read what they're saying about you? that you're no fun since the war was won in fact you have become all of the things you've always run from'

'i want to hear what you have to say about me, that you'll go on and live without me'

lyrics that stand out for these past days.

i need to do more to make myself happy. i should be happy. i like to sing and dance even if i'm not the best at it, i'm still going to do it no matter what. and even if i had the worst day of my life, i can sit wherever i want and listen to the songs that make me happy and i will be happy even if everyone else in the world is hurting. i guess that's selfish of me. but i'm trying out the world from a self preservation view. call me crazy.

so that was done yesterday, i just didn't post it because i didn't feel like it...so yesterday as compared today...what happened...

andrea asked me to go out so i did. it was a good time. her friend jessica was there and later on, joe came as well. we were bored so we walked to blockbuster and finally rented THE WIZ!!! which was totally amazing.
at blockbuster, i ran into jeff and lizzy, it made me happy. they're good people :).
at andrea's we watched the wiz!! and absolutely fell in love with it. EASE ON DOWN EASE ON DOWN THE ROOAAAD!!! ::ARMS FLAILING::

so to today....
i didn't do anything really until 9:00. i sorta moped around and went swimming for a little bit, then i fell asleep. i woke up and had some messages to call katie's phone, so i did. and lauren, laura, g-unit (emily), and laura came to pick me up, with katie of course driving.
we didn't know what to do so we decided that sayville was the best bet because we always do. in starbuck's we saw jackie, michelle, cat, and nicole which was fun. we chatted with them for a little while.
i also saw jeff and lizzy again because they are stalking me haha, i also met their friend lisa and later on dave.

i guess that's when things started getting wierd for me. there were two groups of friends, in the same spot. (oh yeah, we met up with jamie and megan also at starbucks)
i mean, i tried my best to talk to everyone but i guess with a sleuth of dirty looks, disgruntled faces, and just attitude shifts as well as not like acknowledging me, one could take a hint.

maybe i've overthinking and no one was mad. i know for sure who wasn't but i also know for sure who definately is mad at me.
i really don't know what to do.
i'm not going to give up trying to hangout with everyone as much as i can. i can't just like be like, i don't know. hard to explain.

THE BABY IS UNNATURALLY GREEN!
TAKE IT AWAY!
TAKE IT AWAY!
SO YOU SEE IT COULDN'T HAVE BEEN EASY
NO ONE MOURNS THE WICKED!!

well, i kinda just stopped and thought that at the end of the day, at least i'll have my music to come back too even if i can't sing it well hahaha. i'll always have my pretend i'm a rockstar moments.

call me a loser.
i have it to look forward too whenever i want it.

i really don't know how to like live life haha. as stupid as that sounds, it always seems that i am doing something wrong to someone as one time or another even if i think i'm doing nothing wrong, there's always something that someone else picks up on. and everyone says not to care but how can you not, i don't know. i really am one big pile of contradiction.

FEELING THINGS I'VE NEVER FELT
THOUGHT I NEVER SHOW IT
I'D BE SO HAPPY I COULD MELT

THE WIZARD! AND IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!

i needed more tunes to complete this.

i don't even know why i'm typing in here.

i know what makes me happy and what doesn't.
this entry is too long for me.
i wish i could put a picture on here to end it but i am too lazy to do that right now.
so i'll just quit right now before i get any more confusing.

LET'S JUST SAY
I LOATHE IT ALL!!!

later days everyone.

i like the way that feels...

Wed, 28 Jul 2004 16:45:46 GMT

i've been doing nothing lately. seriously, pjs and sleeping all day and then music at night. it's what i've become.

actually, yesterday was a change of pace when i watched movies all day with my sister, nikki. what did we watch? we watched cheaper by the dozen followed by dirty dancing havana nights, and then we ended with love actually. which is one of my all time favorite movies ever.

i don't feel like updating anymore just because i have nothing to write about.

my birthday is soon.
woohoo?

loathing

Mon, 26 Jul 2004 03:52:38 GMT

hi

i'm thinking about calling the online journal thing off. what do you think? sometimes i think it's just pointless and other times i just get plain bored of it. i don't know, just a thought.

when i start typing on something like this for a long amount of time, my head leans all the way down to my right side for some reason. i don't even realize i'm doing it most of the time, it just sorta happens and i don't know why.

today was pretty relaxed. didn't get ready till around 3:00, went to starbucks with maggie and jamie. then we drove around listening to music and such. took a trip down to bayport beach. ashlee simpson is fun to play in the car, fyi. we hung out at maggie's for a while and watched tv and whatever. then we decided to go to applebee's. then after that we went to starbuck's again, but this time in sayville instead of oakdale/bohemia.
wow, i know that was really descriptive and all, but i guess i'm tired.
it was a fun day.
i enjoy laughing, there were lots of it.

i've started to think about myself more and more lately. okay, that came across in a totally conceited way, but i certainly didn't mean it that way. i've realized that there isn't much to me at all you know, no real substance. i really don't do anything, as wierd as that sounds, when i sit and think about it, i don't.
maybe it's a self-pity think, i'm not really sure. and believe me when i say, this certainly isn't a 'feel sorry' for me plea, cause i am no such person as much as some want to think it.
teenage angst, maybe? i think tonight i'll read perks again or listen to some music that can move me. maybe that'll do me some good. the past nights i've been in the wierdest mood. i usually know what to do with myself when that happens, but i guess i've been lacking, a lot lately.

with everything.

i haven't touched my summer work yet. well,i have, about two questions out of approximately one million. i should get going on that because my grades are the only thing i am relying on for college and i don't even try as hard to do as good as i know i am capable of. talk about too many words for a simple thought.

when it comes to my family, nothing really is ever that good. i don't like talking about it, especially things on here. i am not happy here. people have it worse, but this is my stuggle. sometimes i don't know how much longer i can take it until i snap again, and again, and again.
it's abuse in some form, that's how i look at it.
these ties are broken, or wearing very very thin at least.

lastly, is the social life. my friends. it's becoming a hard balance. i hangout with different groups of friends and you start to worry about who you're ignoring on accident and who you're spending too much time with. i don't feel like typing anymore.

i am lacking.
maybe it's just the mood and this angry self-analysis.

maybe someone needs to shake my by the shoulders and wake me up to realize something.

i have no clue.

don't be worried; i am fine.

now i could make this obvious
and you, you could deny my all in one breath
you could shrug my off your shoulders

just forget me, it's that simple?

yeah.
definately wierd mood.

i'm calling it a night.

so later days.

his dreams were his ruin...

Sat, 24 Jul 2004 03:56:30 GMT

i broke into my old cds today. it had been the same like three over and over again for the past few weeks but i decided to go back into my binder thing and just start listening to them some more. it's funny how fast you can forget such good songs. i guess you don't really forget them since when you put them back on, you know all of the words. but you push them aside? i don't know. i guess i'm just rambling. it's wierd to think that so many people are missing out on good songs, makes me think that i'm missing out on lots of stuff. i don't like to miss out but i tend to a lot.
i'm in a wierd mood. i don't write like this usually in my posts, but tonight is one of those nights and you are just going to have to deal with it.

i'm in the mood to do a survey. i'm going to do it and then ramble on some more about my night and just random stuff in general.

|| BASICS ||
name: David
nicknames: Dave & Davey. but no one calls me davey in real life, online only. my 1st and 2nd grade teachers used to call me davey dave.
sex: i'm a guy.
birthday: august 6th
age: 16, but 17 soon.
star sign: leo.
place of birth: omaha. yea, right, i wish. i was born in south side hospital, wherever that may be.
nationality: 'i'm an american'
current residence: bluepoint, the most exciting place ever.
hair color: light brown. once it was bleached blonde, and another time it was black.
eye color: green? i don't know really.
height: 5-10 or 5-11

|| BODY iLLS + SKiLLS ||
do you bite your nails: not usually. i hope not.
can you roll your tongue: nope.
can you blow smoke rings: wouldn't know about that.
can you blow spit bubbles: i try but they always end up popping.
can you cross your eyes: yes, i can cross just one, or two, whichever you prefer...HANDS DOWN THIS IS THE BEST DAY oh lord, dashboard confessional.
can you flip your eyelids out: no thanks.
tattoos and where: don't have any.
piercings and where: don't have any of those either.
do you make your bed daily: sometimes, when i remember and don't sleep too late. i usually make it right before i go to bed cause i can't stand getting in a gross not made bed.

|| CLOTHES ||
what goes on first bra or underwear: well, you know, since i wear a bra.
which shoe goes on first: depends.
speaking of shoes, have you thrown one at someone: maybe. yes.
how much money is usually in your wallet: since i never have money, i don't have a wallet.
what jewelry do you wear 24/7: my rope bracelet, and sometimes a wristband. is that even considered jewelry?
whats sexiest on a guy: hmmm it depends i guess. i know i feel sexiest in sweater and awesome jeans. holla atcha boi. i don't feel like doing this anymrore haha.
whats sexiest on a gurl: sweater and jeans and cold red cheeks. aka joey from dawson's creek during the winter months. AHH scarves.
would you rather be on time and look ok or late and look great: o0o0o0 depends on the situation.

|| FOOD ||
do you twirl your spagetti: sometimes.
what utensils do you use eating pizza: none.
do you cook: i think i can. i did my career report in middle school on being a cook.

|| GROOMiNG ||
how often do you brush your teeth: once in the morning, but only sometimes before i go to bed.
how often do you shower/bath: once a day, if i'm going out. depends on what i'm doing and such.
how long do these showers last: half hour? a little less. do i have to shave or not?
hair drying method: towel and it gets pretty dry then air dry. but when hair gets longer, blowdryeeerrr.
do you paint your nails: nope.

|| MANNERS ||
do you swear: i guess, i like to think nto a lot though.
do you spit in public: nope.
do you pee in the shower: disgusting, no.

|| IN + AROUND ||
the cd player: the rocket summer, acoustic mix, wicked soundtrack, and 'other stuff' cd.
person you talk most on the phone with: laura is the only person who calls me.
what color is your bedroom: light blue walls, dark blue carpet, white ceiling.
you use an alarm clock: nope.
you ever skinny dipped with the opposite sex: nope.
or sunbathed in the nude: nope.
whats your sleeping position: depends on mood.
what kind of bed do you like: my bed's cool.
in hot weather do you use a blanket: haha yes i do.
do you snore: nope, i don't snore. i know because i can sleep and hear myself at the same time.
do you sleepwalk: nope.
do you talk in your sleep: nope.
do you sleep with a stuffed animal: no thank you.
how about the light on: only when i wake up after a scary dream and i think someone's in the house and going to kill me.
do you fall asleep with the tv or radio on: i used to sleep with the tv on, but then in my dreams what the tv was saying would be in them and it wierded me out.

|| WHEN WAS THE LAST TiME YOU ||
were kissed or kissed someone: NEVER!
watched bambi: like only one part a long long time ago. bambi's a boy you know.
talked on the phone: today.
read a book: last week.
punched someone: in the car. a few hours ago.

|| FRIENDS ||
who is your best friend: laura, when she feels like it ;) just kidding, LAURA IS MY BEST FRIEND.
what friend makes you smile the most: hmmm. my dog never fails at it.
that you miss the most: hmm i don't know. i miss people i don't get to see for long times.

|| MUSiC ||
is music important to you: yes'm
do you sing: in my room or house, when i'm alone and sure no one can hear, then yes.
what instruments do you play: do i play any of those? i know like part of one song on piano and i suck at anything music.
what do you think of Eminem: my sister likes him
in your opinion, what band is the best of all time:toughie. i will love rocket summer forever but dash is up there. o0o damien rice is oh so lovely as well. TOO HARD MOVING ON!

|| DO YOU LIKE ||
pop music: yes.
rock music: sure,
punk music: sometimes.
rap music: depends.
hip-Hop/RB: kinda.
country: awh, yes.
jazz: funny to dance too.
classical: when it sounds good..

|| LOVE ||
do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend: NO
if so, whats his/her name: NOOOOOO
how long have you guys been together: shut up.
longest relationship: whatever.
shortest relationship: lame.

yes, i did that survey before and i wanted to do it again because i was bored. the end part made me angry but i'm alright now, so back to my night.

okay, about a week ago i was off to the downtown to see a show when my mom called me saying that her and my sister were going to see Cats at gateway in patchogue and wanted to know if she should get me a ticket. i didn't want to go with them so i told them no and she said okay and i thought it would be done with. no no no, my mom, the other day says that i have to go because she got me a ticket. this didn't make sense to me because i didn't want one and had plans to go to port jeff on friday night, aka tonight. port jeff fell through and laura was having people over to watch movies so i would go to that. so we all end up fighting. i'm the bad son of course because i don't want to spend time with my sister and mother meanwhile my dad and other sister don't have to go because they don't want too. it only causes a problem when i don't want too.
we're not a family. i don't understand the need to want to act like one. to me, it's too late for that. personal personal personal.
so i end up getting yelled at when i'm not ready for the 8:00 show when i told them i wasn't going like hours ago. so i'm forced to get dressed and dragged to the show.

it had no plot.
i didn't understand.
don't get me wrong, it was nice to watch and i probably would have enjoyed it more in the right state of mind. the people had nice voices and it made me want to be good and dance but i took it as 'we're cats, let's introduce ourselves' maybe that is the plot and i just missed it haha.

i don't know.
but now i'm left here with my wierd mood and thinking about lots of different songs that i wish i could sing well. i don't know why i'm thinking about it and how nice lyrics can be sometimes.
like take the song 'the competition' by the goodlife just a piano and a voice, but so much more.

he met this girl from reno
who's life was a competition
she looked just like a china doll
with porcelain skin, she knew he had let her win
so he fell for her,
as if he fell from his mother into the arms of a lover
and he swore not to leave her side
for better or for worse, whichever comes first

sadly the latter arose

she met this boy from omaha
who's life was handed to him
but still, he wanted everything
his dreams were his ruin
and she couldn't wake him up
but the bough broke and he fell
like the time he fell from his mother into the arms of a doctor
so he cried like that first day of his life
he knew he had broken this beautiful porcelain

and how could their world be the same?

and so it never was the same

she whispers his name

i'll stay, if you want, but i could never be who you imagine me to be, i'll stay, i don't know what else to do...
but i can't change for you
i won't change for you

what an incredible song.
i could list so many more, but that was the one that popped into my head for some reason.

this entry really is pointless and i'm achieving nothing by doing it, but i just felt like it. don't ask why, i just did.
with that i'm going to end this one.

goodnight.
later days everyone.

she's a brick and i'm drowning slowly...

Thu, 22 Jul 2004 16:31:11 GMT

i need to get out and buy lots of cds. there comes a problem when your parents don't have any money or a job. oh well, someday i'll be able to buy whatever i want.

i'm really tired right now. it's 12:00 on a wednesday morning, actually, it's a thursday morning. tomorrow is friday, my mom, one of my sisters, and i are going to see Cats at patchogue theatre. i sort of don't want to though because i just don't want to have like that sort of family outing, haha, guess i'm sorta wierd.

the other day i went to the city. i told my parents that i was going to roosevelt field for the day because if i told them i was going to the city, then they wouldn't have let me gone. it was a fun day, the train ride there seemed longer than usual. i went with my friend lindsay, we met two of her friends there. we decided to wait online for TRL because we had nothing to do, three hour wait for nothing, the show was overbooked and we weren't able to get up. then we went to the other side where we saw P.DIDDY and JAY-Z. and by saw i mean, they ran by real fast into their car. however, i did manage to get a picture. afer that we got food and decided to check out the line for ashlee simpson's record signing, since we had passes from buying the cd earlier that day. the line was sectioned off and really long around the block, and it was perfect timing, just as we got there, they were letting the second section in and there was this big gap between people. our cue to jump in the line, and boom we're in, haha not too long a wait to meet ashlee. when she came down the stairs, every screamed and i started uncontrollably laughing for who knows why.
so i have to explain something else. if you ever have seen the ashlee simpson show, on one episode she does this really manly deep voice and says 'i'm gonna be a model' and 'what do you drive? i drive a suzuki sidekick. it's turqouise' and it cracks me up. i was doing it the entire day before the signing. so now that i explained that...this is what happened when we got to her table...
the guy takes our cd booklets and puts them on the table and she starts signing and lindsay goes 'hey i have a question' and ashlee goes 'hey, whats up' and then lindsay goes 'you know that voice you do' and ashlee, in the voice, 'loideen?' and lindsay is like 'yea, keep doing it!' and ashlee says 'hey, whats up' in that man voice and i'm cracking up. then lindsay goes 'he can do it!' and pulls me closer. and ashlee goes 'omg you have to do it for me, you have to do it' and so i say 'i'm gonna be a model. what do you drive? i drive a susuki sidekick, it's turqouise.' all in that manly dykeish voice. and she goes (cracking up) 'omg you do it better than me!!! you should come up with a name for that' then we said our thank yous and goodbyes, and left that store, and made our way home.

i guess it isn't too good of a story but it was a good day and a good memory that i have now.
i can say 'remember the time i met ashlee simpson?'
i like that. a lot.

what else have i been up too? i feel like i've been wearing pajamas for the past five days and have done nothing. but i went to the city the other day, but it still feels that way cause i haven't done anything since i've seen the notebook. i guess it's my own fault partially but oh well.
i've been swimming in my pool, woohoo?
and there's this one float that's impossible to get on too.
i hate that god damn pink dinosaur.

i want to go to the beach but at the same time i don't because of last time's horrific sunburn.
i need to go to driver's ed.
i have a birthday party to go to this saturday.
my birthday is coming up.
i have to decide what i'm going to do but that usually doesn't happen to the day of.

so i think i like pictures too much. and i'm in the mood to post some on here from a while ago. i wish i was able to like make those links in my entry where it takes you to another page to see them but i don't know how to do that so i'm just going to post them on here...

i like winter a lot more than i like summer for some reason...these are from one day, when it was snowing and my dog and i decided to go for a walk...

i love scarves and spinning.

stop sign at the end of my street.

oh, the snowwwww.

more snow fun. big and gross, but still fun?

this next picture is my favorite from the rocket summer show<3 i couldn't get the pic of him and i on here so these will do

for some reason i just think that picture is awesome.

i love the acoustic guitar, so much.

what a fun day.

i think that is enough for pictures.
i hope they come out on everyone's computer.
or that i did it right.

i think that's going to be it for now.
comment me people.

later days everyone.

oh, the rocket summer

Sun, 18 Jul 2004 18:51:14 GMT

it snowed in texas;but you missed;the first time since '86

who saw the rocket summer yesterday and met mr.bryce avary again? oh yeah, that's right, dave did.

he is just too awesome.
my photos will be developed soon.

look at those teeth!!

later days people.

velcome and bienvenu velcomeee.....

Sat, 17 Jul 2004 05:59:25 GMT

that song is stuck in my head still.

so tonight was fun, to say the least. it was all sorta spur of the moment too, which is always nice. my parents decided to be good tonight and give me money. ashley IMed me saying basically that her mom and her were coming to get me to take us to see Caberet at CM, then off to applebee's afterwards.
we got there a little late but that was okay and sat in the middle. the show was a little risque for my likings, but good in my eyes none the less. but what do i know about musicals. anyways, during intermission, we found some more people. i hope i get the names right :(. i met melissa who was very uhm energetic haha, and james peabody who i heard a lot about and is one of the funniest people i've ever met, lizzy (sp?) who was super cute, super nice, and had an awesome laugh, and jeff who was just awesome haha. ashley and i took seats in front of them for the rest of the show. and oh lord, you wouldn't guess who was in it. mr.weber from middle school, yes, yes, yes, and alex belinksy and mr.smith were in the pit orchestra. strange, i know.
afterwards, we split up. jeff, ashley, and i went with lizzy in her car to pick up ashley's friend tom and then we were to meet up with melissa and james at applebee's. it took us a while to get to tom's but we got him, and then we got sorta lost getting back to applebee's because of a wrong turn but that was okay.
on the way to tom's house, everyone sang. everyone meaning jeff, lizzy, and ashley. oh how i am jealous of their voices and the awesomeness of it. they all just like whoa, whoa, whoa. impressed the non-musical david.

we met up at applebee's and we all ordered. it was fun there. lots of laughing but in that wierd way hahaha. hard to explain but i know i enjoyed myself. yupp yupp. on the way home, jeff played me lizzy singing 'defying gravity' and it was just awesome because she recorded herself singing every part in it, like ninety of her singing. then he put on the normal version and sang it hahahaha.
she gave me a ride home after that.
it was a nice night.
i like meeting new people.
i hope i see them again haha. three month stints aren't the best thing for me.

oh, yeah, so not to make this entry negative or anything, but i've decided that i have the worst luck, ever. i don't feel like explaining that but take it for what it's worth. yupp, that's it for tonight.
i have to get up early tomorrow for a show at the downtown.

goodnight everyone.

isn't it nice to know...

Thu, 15 Jul 2004 23:51:06 GMT

i wish i knew how to upload pictures onto here. xanga was easy, you just copy and paste, copy and paste, but on here they don't even give you the option. so if you know, leave me a message or something because i can't figure it out.

anyways, it's about time i updated this thing. there's been no luck with the job hunt yet. starbuck's people are liars. when i dropped off the application the lady called me over and was all 'blah blah good good, first job great, def. expect a call on sunday' and no call.....
bitch.
i told that story a million times, but i think that one more won't hurt anybody. so no income yet.

i want to see wicked with kristen chenoweth, but that's not going to happen.

it's 7:23 pm and i'm still in pajamas.

i hope i do something tonight.

my parents are out foodshopping.

starbucks? anyone, anyone?

random thoughs for some people. the rocket summer concert is on saturday, i'm excited for that. it starts at 2:00 and i think that's wierd, this means, i'm going to have to wake up earlier to prepare. oh, and listen to this, my parents are going to a concert the same day. they are going to see some orchestra play led zeppelin songs at brookhaven ampitheatre or however its spelled, talk about lame.
i wish they were going on a different day so i could be home without them, i like it that way.

my parents just got back and made me bring in groceries, it was fun, believe me, it was.

i wonder what's for dinner.

people should come online so that i can go out and do something with them.

the other night i went to applebee's with laney, letsch, and flynnstah and we all ordered our food. laney got some blondie dessert thing, letsch got the jalapeno peppers, flynnstah got nachos nuevos, and i got the lemon berry cheesecake. okay okay, so when i get mine, i'm thinking they messed up the order. cause seriously, compared to the picture, this thing was non-existant. it was good and all, but it was like a free sample at costco rather than a full dessert, i guess when they put it on the 'weightwatchers' part of the menu, they really meant it. i ordered it cause i thought it would taste good, not because of the weightwatchers haha. it was the size of a quarter, give or take an inch or two.
now what flynn got was the exact opposite. it was a mountain of nachos, tomatoes, jalapenos, beef, and beans. oh, and the chips were multi-colored. no one was expecting that, and you know, flynn didn't finish it even though i tried to help, there was just too much madness going on in that plate. we're never ordering that again, unless we're all sharing it. i give half-price appetizers a holla because it's the way to eat.

that same night i tried to win the ashlee simpson contest on z100 a million times. i got through like six times but no luck on actually winning. on a monday i amm waitingggg, you all know you love her. that's a new anthem for letsch's car along with maroon 5 and britney's slow tune. car rides are fun.

my sunburn healed 8-) but now i'm peeling.

i want to be able to drive.

driver's ed is going to suck.

yesterday, laura and i rented thirteen and watch it. it's hard to describe but i'll do my best. picture two thirteen year old girls wearing slutty clothes, doing gross things with boys and throw in a bunch of drugs, shoplifting, and domestic fights, and that's basically it. i mean, you should go watch it, seriously, go go go now now now. they should have made the girls older, cause the seventh grade angle isn't really hot these days.

i'm in the mood to watch love actually but i don't have it and i don't feel like going and renting it.

i'm going to change to my default picture one of these days, once i take a good one to put on here.
what do you think?
it's about time for a change.
i'm not going to touch the layout though.
it was a pain in the ass to get it like this.
i'm not very html savvy.

i want to see people who i don't see a lot more, that's why i need to drive. i think new york state should implement 'david's law' allowing me to drive just because i'm david.
oh, yes, good idea there.

i still haven't seen fahrenheit 9-11 but i don't think i want too. laura and i were saying we want to see it just so we can be like in with the controversey and conversation everyone has about it.
i still need to see the notebook. fyi.

this entry is turning out longer than i expected. i guess that happens after six day stints of not updating. and that word was definately spelled wrong, i think. stints stints, oh well, you get the point to it.

i need need need to get out more.

i think that's going to be the end of this one.

later days people.

oh livejournal

Sat, 10 Jul 2004 05:06:37 GMT

i realized that i don't get many comments on here but i think it's due to the lack of friends and my lack of knowing how to add friends on this thing. i'll figure it out soon enough.

i've heard 'ocean avenue' by yellowcard twice on the radio today. it still reaks of that awesome time during prom when they played it. it isn't my favorite song, but something happened when they played that song. everyone seemed to be having fun. haha kim and i rocking out on the violins and jumping around with our dates. it was just such a great night....not to mention, it was dedicated to the queen and the king, aka me. hahaha.

so today was a pretty good day, if i do say so myself. i woke up, watched some dawson's creek <3, and then katie said that we should go out and look for jobs, so we did just that. we applied to a lot of places. i'm aiming for the sears potrait studio slot at the moment because i think i would enjoy that one the most, pictures pictures pictures, and it was very clean in that spot in the mall. the application was very short as well, which was also a plus. c'mon call me people, this kid needs some money.
we applied and looks for places that were hiring, then we hit up sayville starbucks. there we ran into melissa, a good friend and my prom date haha, then we visited the flynnstah at her job in sayville then we continued on our hunt. we gave some more applications then decided to call it a day.
i got home and had dinner.
then i decided to print out a starbucks application and apply to the drive-thru one in oakdale/bohemia. they said to expect a call on sunday, so now i'm hoping that i get this job, since i knew about starbucks i've been dying to work there and now my chance has come. this boosts my cool level up some more. i don't want to jinx it, but i have high hopes. don't screw me over life.

when i got back home letsch invited me out with her, flynnstah, and laney whom i haven't seen since her trip to gull island to count birds. we went to friendly's, flynnstah wanted french fries so we did that and we just rode around until around 11 where we all went home.

chris invited me to go to applebee's with him but ya know, my parents suck, think i'm 12 and i wasn't allowed to go.

i saw laura twice today. it was awkward, we didn't speak directly, i tried to avoid it. i still don't get what's wrong between us. i think it's because we're so alike, who knows, i just wish things were normal again, or like some miracle happened and we were allowed to be the best friends we want to be. that only makes sense to me, and if she reads this, her too.

tomorrow i'm going to the beach, the first time since may.

i hope i get a sunburned face.
that has to be one of my most favorite things.

i've found a spot on the wicked cd that makes me happier than the rest of it does. on the first track, after kristen does her opera sounding part, the guy who says "no one mourns the wicked" i love that part.
figured i'd share.

::crosses fingers for job::

summer homework sucks.
i better get into NYU.
i'm still setting my hopes too high.
i need to get that SAT score up.
hey, it's summer, let's stop talking about school davey.
i just called myself davey.
billy's the only one who calls me that in real life.
a lot of people call me it online.

okay. definate a.d.d. moment. sorry haha.

'it's really uh sharp, don't ya think? you know black is this year's pink'
i like the way broadway tunes rhyme.
it's something i notice and enjoy, lots.

this was one of the more random entries of mine.

i think i'll end with that.
later days, everyone.

let's go down to the Ozdust ballroom

Fri, 09 Jul 2004 04:12:33 GMT

i think i'm going to start and try to keep updating this thing with the whole slacking three months thing, i owe it something.

i don't know what i'm going to write about.

today i hung out with andrea since we haven't hung out for like a month. first we watched the wizard of oz, well after we danced and sang around. we then took loads of pictures, then we photoshopped ourselves into the wizard of oz cause we're just that good. mad normal, i know.

i'm on the verge of losing my best friend, for the second time this year. last year it fell through and this time, i need to hold on. as corny as all this sounds. i'm a serious guy, and i don't know what to do. it basically comes down a girl, with her boyfriend on one arm and her best friend on her other. it just gets really hard, i think, for it to work out so everyone's happy. and we got this far, so i don't know what's going on that we're always upset towards one another but i hope to god that everything works out how i think it should. jealousy isn't a nice thing at all, but i tend to have a lot of it right now. lots of starbuck's trips until this all gets better.
phew, done with the vent. i hope she isn't upset that i wrote about it in here, although i don't think that she reads it that often anyways.
don't worry, i'm determined to succeed.

i'm going to be 17 in less than a month for anyone who cares.

i need a job

this summer is going way too fast and nothing exciting is really happening. i need to change that people. i don't want to be senior, or i do, but i won't want the year to end. i don't really want out of highschool as much as i do for the sake of not being in my house anymore. i think i have my hopes set too high though, i need to start being realistic. trying to prepare myself for the letdown that could be the rejection letter from NYU, i have some time before any of that gets into perspective though, so no use thinking ahead.
the other day, i actually started looking at some of my summer work, that was a shock to myself. i mean, i usually don't touch any of that stuff till' a few days before school. now that is a sign that this summer is in need for some improving.

why do i feel that i am doing lots of spelling errors on this...i also wish that i knew how to update this thing with photos because i don't and i think that sucks because i would like too. livejournal is just too complicated for my likings sometimes.

my parents should be removed. something that i always complain about. i know a lot of people have it a lot worse, but it's what i have and i don't like it so yeah. i actually walked in on my mom going through stuff in my room the other day when i asked her to get my cd player on my bed, but instead, she decided to snoop through the messenger bag. that stupid shit pisses me off. yeah, more random venting for everyone who reads this.

anyone up for the beach? i only went once this year, and it was may 29th, when it was cold and windy. let's set up a date, anyone, anyone. i don't even know who i'm writing too, only like three people read this.

i really need to work things out with laura.

i'll end with that.
later days everyone.

oh i couldn't be happier.

*edit*
sorry for the bad mood rant, but i needed it.